Understanding love might be easier with this by your side
Guide to modern dating and Gen Z terms
Looking at the response I got for my “A comprehensive guide to using Gen Z and Gen Alpha slang” article, I present to you another guide that will help you survive modern dating.
In times when an appropriate amount of rizz is essential for a successful dating life, many find it hard to keep up with the ever-changing and continuously evolving language of love.
If you are someone like that, this list of modern dating slang is just what you need! Whether you’re deep in the dating game or simply curious about what kind of flag your partner is, read on.
Red Flag
When a person seems to have toxic, manipulative, and intolerable traits, they are called red flags.
For example, when your partner tells you who you can or can’t be friends with, or they don’t communicate during any disagreements, they are a red flag and you just immediately show them the exit.
This one is rather simple to figure out. If your gut says its a red flag, it usually is.
Green Flag
When a person has traits that make them secure, healthy, and compatible with you, they are full of green flags.
For example, when your partner is emotionally mature and communicates with you well in uncomfortable situations, they are more likely a green flag.
Beige Flag
These are neutral to eccentric quirks that are neither a red flag nor a green flag. These traits can range from being totally harmless, to being somewhat annoying without causing any real harm or risk to the relationship.
When your partner leaves their socks everywhere in the house and drives you up the wall but is something you can live with, that’s a beige flag. If you are on the fence about whether something is a red or a green flag, it’s likely a beige flag.
Benching
Keeping a love interest “on the bench” without fully committing.
If a person is more than a friend but apprehensive about calling you their partner, they are most likely benching you. And if that frustrates you, no you are not making a big deal out of nothing.
Breadcrumbing
This is the term for essentially a manipulation tactic that strings someone on, leaving breadcrumbs of affection sprinkled with occasional romantic attention, without any actual intention of committing to a relationship.
If you have a tinder match that appears once every new moon and showers you with compliments and vanishes again the next day, I am sorry to say that you are being breadcrumed.
Cuffing Season
The time of year when single people look for short-term partners to spend time with during the colder months.
If you wanna dodge questions like “are you seeing someone?” at family dinners or not feel horrible while watching Bridget Jones’s Diary during the holiday season, this is the way to go.
Dry Dating
Going on dates without the intention of consuming alcohol. You’ll be surprised how many dates end in a drunken disaster. This might be the thing to do if you want a second date.
Matching one’s freak
To match someone’s freak is to find someone who shares the same niche interests or eccentric behaviors.
For example, when a person who loves wearing interesting looking socks finds someone who has a similar inclination, they match each other’ freaks. This could be a thing in friendships too but then, the best relationships are the ones where your partner is also your best friend.
Ghosting
The act of completely cutting off all forms of communication without any apparent reason.
I am sure we have all been ghosted at least once and yeah, it feels terrible.
Groundhogging
When someone repeatedly dates the same person over and over, while expecting different results.
Your friend who keeps going back to the same person and promises that “they have changed”, they are groundhogging.
Hardballing
Being clear and upfront about expectations early on in a relationship. This is actually rather healthy. No false promises, no hurt feelings.
For example, when a person tells you they are looking for a serious relationship on your first date, they hardballed you.
Roommate Syndrome
A state in a relationship where the couple feels more like roommates or cohabitants rather than a romantic relationship.
Shrekking
Dating someone you aren’t attracted to or who you consider not up to your standards, in the hope that they will treat you better in return. This trend was named after the movie Shrek, with reference to Shrek and princess Fiona’s relationship.
Situationship
A sexual or romantic relationship without any clear commitment or long-term future. A portmanteau of “situation” and “relationship”.
When it is a relationship even though it has not been labeled as one, it is a situationship.
Sneaky Link
A person you are casually hooking up with in secret. Other terms for this are booty calls or a no-strings situationships.
Soft Launch
Subtly showing people you’re in a relationship by posting somewhat concealed pictures of your partner online.
For example, an Instagram post of two drinks next to each other or a picture of you and your partner’s hands held together without revealing their face.
Hard Launch
This is the opposite of the soft launch. Just like a soft launch, you tell the world you’re dating but this time with no concealment. People often do so by posting an image of the person they are seeing on social media.
Stonewalling
Refusal to communicate or engage during conflict by withdrawing and creating a wall between oneself and one’s partner. This is a defense mechanism, but it can also be used as a punishment or a manipulation tactic.
Talking Stage
The initial stage in dating just before defining the relationship. This is the stage of getting to know someone before you decide to date them. It is the time when the involved parties are constantly calling or texting each other.
Trad wife
Short for “traditional wife.” It refers to women who subscribe to stereotypical gender roles and values. They often push a conservative or anti-feminist principles.
U-hauling
A queer term to describe a relationship that moves extremely quickly. We all know partnerships where certain things were said rather early. Ted Mosby, I am side-eyeing you!
Yearners
A person who has an intense desire or craving for someone or something. A great example of a yearner would be Anthony Bridgerton, from Netflix’s Bridgerton season 2. Actually, all the Bridgerton brothers are, in fact, yearners. They share the same brain cell.
There you have it! Your very own pocket dictionary of modern dating terms. You can now hard launch your knowledge even if you fear getting ghosted. Should you catch any red flags during the talking stage or feel like you’re getting benched, stonewalled, or breadcrumbed, do not Shrek yourself. Be patient and you shall find someone who will match your freak!
