Sweet November is the worst love movie ever


Sappy, stupid, and basically just shit

Fuck off, Sweet November. / Brett Nielsen

Fuck off, Sweet November. / Brett Nielsen

Author: Ethan Butterfield

As we begin to countdown to that most important of traditions, Valentine’s Day, let’s take a look at probably one of the worst love/romantic movies out there, Sweet November. It was a film released in 1968, but was later remade, before the remakes were a thing, in 2001. The 2001 version is the one I’ll be looking at today.

It stars the likes of Keanu Reeves (as Nelson Moss) and Charlize Theron (as Sara Deever) as they work gradually towards the ultimate goal of not ending up together…wait what?!?! You read me right; it’s a romantic movie without the romance. Ok,, maybe I should be a bit fairer. This film does have romance. It’s just that it’s so overdone and so overused. There have been several movies that have done it before and done it better.

There’s one scene in the film that is totally unbearable; two characters walk into the street and begin yelling at each other, letting their feelings out and being honest…in the rain, because it is always in the rain. The film itself is kinda depressing all in all though. It’s definitely romantic in the sense, but it’s not something that you’d pop into the VCR (yeah, that won’t seem dated) and snuggle up to your significant other to enjoy.

As I mentioned before, the guy doesn’t get the girl in the end (So, spoiler alert, if you even cared). Rather, he becomes a better man because of her and that’s what we’re meant to take away from it. That’s worse though. All that time tugging at the audience’s heartstrings and no with pay off. What a load of crock.

The scenes in the film develop and characterize the two main lovebirds who can make you sicker to your stomach than you’d want. Then add in all the soft wishy-washy music and walks on the beach you could possibly handle. I have to give credit where credit is due though: Nelson changes a lot to become a better man than he was before Sara runs off.

A guy that has to change while being with a girl, huh, never heard that one before, but I joke of course. In reality this film kinda feels like you’re going through a checklist of romantic clichés. You know the ones: stare lovingly into each other’s eyes, check; yell how you feel about each other in the rain, check; show the main man realizing he’s changed because of what is occurring in his life, check; have the dramatic scene where they get angry at each other, I suppose I’ll just keep checking off these boxes.

It even feels like Titanic at the end, without the boat and the water, sadly. Nelson basically chases Sara to the park and Sara stops and says “Let me go, you’ll be stronger if I leave, you’re my immortality!”

I thought the remote fell and it switched to the final minutes of the Titanic. Then she puts a blindfold on Nelson and whispers to him “Remember Me…”

…Really?…*sigh* I can almost hear “My Heart Will Go On” in the background. Then the movie ends and you’re left there supposed to be feeling emotional as “Only Time” by Enya plays, but instead you’re confused and scared.

So, Sweet November…kinda bitter.


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