Sports Roundtable – Forgotten players and teams to remember

Soon we won’t know where he is, either. /image: Arthur Ward

Soon we won’t know where he is, either. /image: Arthur Ward

Participants: brady lang, matt wincherauk, taylor sockett, kris klein, paige kreutzwieser

Which former Rams or Cougars athlete would you like to know what happened to since they graduated?

Lang: I think that former Rams QB Teale Orban would definitely be one to check up on. After a stellar career he fell off the map after being a sixth round draft pick by the Riders in the 2008 CFL Draft. Where could he be?

Wincherauk: Personally, I would love to know what’s going on with former Cougars basketball star, Jamal Williams. Williams was a coach of mine numerous times, and is a great person.

Sockett: Rams ex-pivot Teale Orban. Whatever happened to that guy? With a name that pretty, you’d think he’d end up somewhere.

Klein: What ever happened to that great, great player whose name escapes me? Man was he great. Or better yet what ever happened to former Cougars hockey player Lee Schaefer? Congrats on the new baby boy and future hockey star by the way Schaefs.

Kreutzwieser: Cody Johnstone. Sup? Going to start growing the beard again? It’s getting close to November.

Toronto Maple Leafs forward, Phil Kessel, was recently suspended for the remainder of the pre-season after repeatedly slashing and spearing Buffalo Sabers tough guy, John Scott. What do you think of this suspension?

Lang: Well it was really nice of Sherriff Shanny to give Kessel a nice break before the season. It’s the pre-season, no one cares about the pre-season unless you’re trying to make the team, Kessel is probably sitting at home smiling because he doesn’t have to deal with guys like Scott coming after him in games that mean less than Scott’s career goal total: 1.

Wincherauk: I’m all right with the suspension, but I don’t blame Kessel for swinging like a madman. John Scott has a good eight inches and 70 pounds on Kessel, and probably would have killed him had he gotten a hand on him.

Sockett: As if Leafs fans didn’t have enough reasons to hang their heads about, now they have the biggest pansy in the history of the game on their team. As for the suspension, it was a joke. Maybe the U of R should hire Shanahan to replace Vianne. I’m sure they’re the same level of overpaid in their respected fields.

Klein: I think that all rainforests remaining in the world should watch out for the lumberjack known as Phil Kessel. I think he would make a better career out of being a lumberjack instead of an NHL hockey player. That way he doesn’t have to be picked on by big, bad John Scott. Can your lip hang any further Phil?

Kreutzwieser: I died laughing when I saw a comparison of Kessel to George Michael Bluth’s recreation of Star Wars. But I will take this opportunity to test my “Sports Editor Theory” by saying Kessel didn’t deserve any penalties. I’m sure Autumn will agree with me that it was all in self-defense, right Toronto?

The Saskatchewan Roughriders are currently riding a four-game losing streak. What needs to happen to turn this team around?

Lang: I think that they should just start Tino Sunseri and trade the core of the team. Seems like that’s what every other fickle Rider fan wants nowadays.

Wincherauk: I think a more balanced attack is necessary. Sheets didn’t play, but Durant throwing 52 passes is just way too many. Running by committee for now, and relieve Durant at least a little bit.

Sockett: First of all, cut the pathetic running back, Garrett. That guy’s best chance of making a block is falling down and hoping opposing defences trip over him. The next thing everyone in Rider nation needs to do is calm down and shut up. The team is struggling right now; we have several key parts of the team missing. When they’re back, we will be fine. After all, the team only needs one more win to clinch a playoff spot.

Klein: Hell yeah, I think they can. All teams go through a funk during the season and it is the championship teams that break out of them. The same thing happened to them in 2007 and look what happened. You just have to believe in green.

Kreutzwieser: Not lose to Montreal. Oh wait.

The MLB post-season is just around the corner. Who is your pick to win it all?

Lang: I would be downright insane not to pick my Red Sox. After an incredible turnaround almost everyone in New England has forgotten about Bobby V. and last season’s bizarre collapse. Under the direction of John Farrell, the BoSox will win it all!

Wincherauk: I am a diehard Red Sox fan, and with the way this magical season has been going, I can’t go with anyone else. I believe in the beard, do you?

Sockett: The Boston Red Sox, is what I’d be saying if I was a complete sellout. However, yours truly has not yet been approached with the opportunity to be a sellout. So I’ll go with the Oakland A’s, after all, how could you lose with Brad Pitt as your general manager?

Klein: Well, since the Blow Jays won’t be in it after much hype in the off-season – big surprise there – I have to pick the underdog Pittsburg Pirates. The only reason I am rooting for them is because they probably won’t stand much of a chance and they haven’t been to the playoffs since 1992. Back then, Barry Bonds looked like a normal human being.

Kreutzwieser: It’s got to be the Dodgers. Puig, Kershaw, and pool jumping obviously wins. But an A’s vs. Rangers World Series – pending Monday’s results – would be amazingly decent. An Oakland win against anybody would be legendary, even it is meant beating Brian Wilson’s beard.

According to a video game simulation of the 2013-14 NHL campaign, the St. Louis Blues will be the Stanley Cup champions this year. Do you think this simulation will prove to be accurate?

Lang: See last week’s roundtable. Who was my dark horse to win the Cup? Hitch’s St. Louis Blues of course.

Wincherauk: Absolutely not, I don’t trust any ridiculous simulations in any sport. The Blues are a very good team, but I think the Penguins will take home the cup this year.

Sockett: Lookout Bob Mackenzie, NHL 14 is going to put your fat ass out of a job. But really no, is that a real question? They don’t have a hope in hell.

Klein: St. Louis? Really? I have to go with the Jarome Iginla lead Boston Bruins winning the cup because it is his time to win. He has become the new Marian Hossa of the NHL with not winning the cup. The other thing I hope for is for the Flames to actually win more than 20 games this season. Oh, and for all the Canucks fans saying Calgary is going to have a tough time draining out the Saddledome with only one cup, I got a question for you. Where are your cups? Where are they?

Kreutzwieser: The amount of time I wasted looking things up because of this question has given me no knowledge whatsoever to this year’s predictions, aside from the Blues being the last to jump on the Stanley train from the 67 expansion, which I also wasted time on. Thank you, internet.

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